Sunday, November 15, 2009

Patience is a virtue . . .



. . . that I'm still working to acquire.

So until I get it down, I suspect I'll continue to be banned from doing laundry.

I've broken 2 dryers during nearly 30 years of marriage. As I recall, I made one washing machine go all cattiwampus, too. I promise I didn't do this on purpose.

The problem, you see, is that I tend to overstuff the machines to get the job done as quickly as possible. I can't seem to stop myself, like eating potato chips. So the last time Mr. B had to repair the dryer, he outright banned me from using it.

When I called Ben last night to check on Renie, he asked if I could do some laundry. I swallowed hard, said "Yes, of course," and then had to admit that God has a delightful sense of humor.

My plan was to dive for quarters between the couch cushions and take the linens to a laundromat with the big machines that I couldn't possibly overstuff. But Mr. B was in the car with me when I made the call and he wanted to know about the conversation.

He just about ran off the road when I told him. And, being the frugal guy that he is, he declared that he'd do the laundry, that I was still banned, and that, frankly, it would be his honor.

And so he did, bless his soul.

Image 1 by kukkurovaca
Image 2 by woman banned from doing laundry

29 comments:

Alix said...

OMG! OMG! Larry is ALSO banned from doing laundry. But for different reasons... the man is almost 57 years old, and yet - when it comes to sorting... welll.... what sorting, to put a rather fine point on it. The darks go in with the whites and the colors go in with the lights... Bras go in the regular wash cycle AND dry cycle (horrors!!), towels get dried with cotton active wear (or should I call it lint-wear) and he hasn't learned that anything with lycra or elastic gets hung up to air dry. We may not even discuss the iron, Kathleen, or I may cry.

So - I've simply banned the man from ever going in the laundry room. My sister says is a highly mechanized plot that the male species has designed as to not EVER have to do laundry, but you've just disproved that theory. As for me... luckily I like doing laundry. Now vacuuming? You can have that! And you don't even have to do it well.

XO

Beth said...

My husband was put on permanent laundry restriction about a week into our marriage. It works for both of us.

steven said...

i'm allowed to do my own laundry and my sons. my wife and daughter's laundry is absolutely off-limits to me. there's some issue around "sorting" and "shrinking" and "leaving it in after it's dry and gets all wrinkled".......... ha!! steven

jinksy said...

MY daughter, when she was at college, should have been banned from laundry duty. I had so many 'Rescue please!' phone calls, and bundles of assorted disasters to rectify, you wouldn't believe! It came to something when she started offering my rescue services to her friends though. Thanks to her boasting, I'd earned a reputation as some kind of miracle worker for damaged clothing!
She's got much better with age, I'm happy to report - though I did recently need to do a natty sewing job on HER daughter's dress where the embroidery silk's colours had run. It quite reminded me of old times!

Rudee said...

I need to try your technique to get out of doing the laundry.

ellen abbott said...

Only 2 dryers in 30 years? Sounds like a pretty good record to me! Actually, in our house he does the laundry (didn't always), part of the divvying up of household chores we did after the kids took flight. It annoys him if I try to do any not. My chore? the dishes. A bad trade on my part but I slowly tweaked it so that he also does most of the cooking. Pat me on the back girls.

Janie said...

Back when my kids were teenagers, I was banned from doing their laundry because I made the mistake of drying jeans -- a no-no, apparently.
I'm allowed to do laundry for Steve and I. He pretends to have no idea how to operate household appliances.

Gail said...

Laundry?? What is that?

lakeviewer said...

So, this is how you pass down the chores, one machine bust at a time. I never thought of this technique before.

Finding Pam said...

I have to agree with Ellen's comment...I don't think they are making appliances as good as they use to.

I can so relate to this post.

Barb said...

Oh - to be banned from laundry...in my dreams!

Jennifer Griffin-Wiesner said...

Mr. B. is a good dude.

Gaston Studio said...

Oh, we wouldn't get along at all in the laundry room! I'm totally OCD when it comes to laundry, so I'd have to ban you too if you overstuffed... then I'd make you TRY to fold the items that were so wrinkled from BEING overstuffed, you couldn't even find the seams!

LOL!

Kathleen said...

@Alix! Wow, I feel like I've just been educated about laundry. Where have you been all my life?!?!

Kathleen said...

@Beth: That pretty much says it all! My troubles started when I'd take maternity leave and had to wash those freaking cloth diapers. I just couldn't wait to get the done! Er, crammed into the washer and dryer.

Kathleen said...

@Steven: Yeah, that shrinking thing was a problem when I got banned. We taught each of our kids to do their own laundry when they turned 12. They are GOOD at it. They also had to cook one day a week. We had a lot of hamburger helper, hot dogs, and mac n cheese for a while there, but they're each fabulous cooks in their own right now!

Kathleen said...

@Jinksy: I really wish we were neighbors. I can just see you rescuing anything damaged! You are such a dear. Do you know I had NEVER, not once on my life, used a washing machine before I went to college. What was my mother thinking?!?! I stood at the coin-operated machine for probably 15 minutes trying to sort it out, when another girl in the dorm came by and showed me. SO embarrassing!

Kathleen said...

@Rudee: I'm telling you my friend, you are just too competent at everything! A little incompetence can go a long way. Seriously, try it some time! LOL

Kathleen said...

@Ellen: Oh, you are a miracle worker! Well done!!!
Do you have a dishwasher, other than your hands? I've had one for 2 years. That's it. And I have the hands to prove it!

Kathleen said...

@Janie: Oh, thank GOD, another woman who was banned from laundry. I've always felt like the biggest yahoo. I'm not so good with household appliances, either. Is it possible Steve isn't pretending? Naw, didn't think so. :)

Kathleen said...

@lakeviewer: You know, I never thought of it like that before. But I've burned out a vacuum cleaner and lit a toaster oven on fire. Maybe this is fodder for a book!

Kathleen said...

@Gail:
LOL!!!!!! Exactly!

Kathleen said...

@Finding Pam: That's it! It's not my incompetence, it's poor quality control. Thank you so much for saving my ego!!!

Kathleen said...

@Barb: Until you are out of socks and it's -30 outside! LOL!!!!

Kathleen said...

@Jennifer: Yes, he is. I think I'll keep him. ;)

Kathleen said...

@Jane: Would you like to try some lessons? You could probably take about 2 minutes of me as a student, but we'd be laughing our fool heads off!!!!

♥ Braja said...

Step away from the machine.....
:)

Kathleen said...

@Braja: Done! (Whew! That was close!)

magpie said...

sigh. i wish someone would ban me from doing laundry but i'm the only one here (looks around, confirms this).

i did kill a refrigerator once - stabbed the freezer to death with a knife while (impatienly) trying to defrost. THAT was fun...

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